Not my illness but
my healing
On Wednesday 7th April I went with my wife Annie and one of
the church members, Katie, to the cinemas to watch the film, ‘Blind Side'. It
was a great film which I recommend, lots of apostolic perspective. Part of the treat
was shared popcorn and a coke for me.
After the film as we made ourselves out to the car park
reflecting on the movie, I began to feel nauseous and became aware that I was probably
heading for a bout of sickness.
Over the past few years there have been various episodes of
these attacks, most of which have lasted for a couple of hours. Uncomfortable
but they go of their own accord. I had one attack a few hours before a flight
to Cape Town in 2008 and was unsure if I was going to make the plane. I really
was in spiritual warfare and as my wife and I prayed that time God instantly
healed me.
The last attack before this one was last October. It was so
bad that it lasted two days and I had to go to hospital to be re-hydrated and have
many tests. Apart from the attack, which involves constant vomiting for hours,
they found nothing wrong.
When I got home from the cinema I knew I could not wait too
long so Thursday morning I presented
myself to the Emergency Unit and was admitted for re-hydration, anti-sickness
treatment and observation. I was
discharged the next morning very weak but okay.
During these attacks I have realised that the sickness is
not mine so I don't receive it as such. In all of the pain and discomfort I
simply tell Jesus I love Him, over and over again. I know it is a test and
trial and I decide from the beginning I am loved by God. Does that sound
super-spiritual? I hope not. It's really because I have no option but to
believe what I know in Christ even if I struggle.
When I got home Friday I was very weak and it takes a while
to eat normally and for the vomiting spasms to stop completely. This time I also
developed hiccups for hours at a time. The result was I could not sleep.
I got up and went downstairs about 1 AM Sunday morning. I
had hiccups and it went on for the next two hours without stopping. I tried
every thing I knew, holding my breath, drinking water, scaring myself (that's
quite difficult because you know what's coming). Eventually I got on my knees
in the dark and began to worship God.
As I worshipped I heard the Holy Spirit say, 'lie down'. Now
laying down makes everything worse but I obeyed. I lay on our lounge carpet
where we worship every week and fell asleep for three solid hours. When I awoke
I knew I was healed. I had no spasms, hiccups or nausea. As I slept God gave me
two powerfully vivid prophetic dreams which I am weighing. They were
significant and clear. I woke up with the words, ‘living underneath the shadow
of His wings, we find security'
I got up went to bed and stayed in bed until after church
had met that morning.
Just after lunchtime I received a message from one of the
Church members, Mary. She said this:-
"While we were praying
for you today at church, I saw you lying down on your back and a big hand was
on you. A hand as big as your entire body. In my spirit I felt it was the hand
of God."
This confirmed what I really knew that God was in control
all the time.
Going through ‘various trails and tribulations' is not easy.
I may need to go through other things and they too may not be easy. What have I
learned? What I knew at the outset, God loves me.
The sickness was not mine BUT the healing is.
I give all the glory to God and rejoice that I am worthy to
suffer for His sake.
Prophet Graham Unsworth